StayAtHomeBabe.com

Great photo, Betty Crocker!   I’m truly all for writing whatever I want to write about, if that means I have no niche, then so be it. Some bloggers write for their audience only and cannot understand that some of us also write because it’s FUN for US and that we want our blogs to be diaries of our lives, as multidimensional as they are in real life.

You absolutely should have named this post “Why that comment was bullshit!”. Awesome.

Who is this bitch who wrote that comment? Who is ANYBODY to tell someone what they should or should not write?? You’re a mom, a writer, a blogger, a wife, a friend, a very accomplished home cook and so much more, and you can write about whatever you damn well please.

I’m glad you wrote this to address that comment. 

And you SO are a squishy bear!

I just found your blog and I love it just they way you write it. Maybe this commenter was a newbie but then again pffft.
<3 ya

I think if I wrote a full diary of my life, everyone would run far and fast in the other direction . But to the extent that it is, yeah, I want it to be me. Not some fabrication. No niche… you have a niche. Your niche is awesomeness

I couldn’t decide between the two titles for the life of me

I couldn’t decide if I should write it or not, and then decided to hell with it. Thanks for being my squishy bear cheerleader.

I heart you! Seriously. Thanks for the comment.

I didn’t mean “diary” as in all entries being “woke up, ate breakfast, had a shower…”, but just that there are lots of things going on in our lives and lots of stuff we’re interested in.  And P.S. my niche is definitely NOT awesomeness, I have way too many posts that are exactly along the lines of “woke up, ate breakfast, had a shower…”

Ha! I’ve never read anything in your blog that was anywhere CLOSE to woke up, ate breakfast, had shower. Never. Don’t be crazy. Although… maybe your niche could be crazy.

great response to that comment… i just met you and could tell clearly that you can’t be put into a box about anything, especially blogging Love your style. It’s very uniquely you!

I like you.

I don’t want to alarm you but I think I am the Australian version of you? Oh yeah! xx

can’t be put into a box about anything… my work here is done

Thanks for reading and commenting.

I like you muchly.

Oooooh, me with an Australian accent?! That’s hot.

I have to day that I don’t follow many bloggers, and reply to even fewer.  I have grown to anticipate whe I will see a post on my igoogle homepost that i haven’t read yet.  And when I talk to hubby about what you said that struck my funny bone or thinking cap I say “My friend in the UK,”  and he knows who i mean.   Some times there are people who dont get the reasons, but they feel compeled to change you, they may have felt that it changed your format to talk about food, but we have to eat the dang stuff a million times in our lives, eventually someone needs to ask for idea and recipes, cause it can get boring.

Just in case you haven’t noticed I love you, just the way you are my friend, don’t feel the need to change, just rant a littlemore!

you go girl. I’m a new reader and I think your blog is fabulous. I absolutely love that you would have titled it “why that comment was bullshit” You rock. That.Is.All

Kerry xx

Giant hugs, hot stuff. I am so honored to be your friend in the UK. That’s such a fucking nice thing to say. Seriously. Tell hubs your friend in the UK says hi.

Thank you so much for saying so. Seriously, the comments from you and anyone else who reads this space mean so much to me.

Nay-sayers just indicate blogging success. We all love your separate personalities: Kinky, Mommy, Cook, Woman. We love you all!!

Then I feel so successful!

Multiple personalities… I’m telling that to my husband next time I’m bitchy. Honey, it’s just my bitchy personality. My blog friends understand!

This post? Is perfection.

That is all.

Totally hot!

This post? Is perfection.

That is all.

I’m not sure I’ve ever been perfection in my life. I’ve been close to perfection, maybe. But perfection? Thanks!!!

I know you are, but what am I? Okay, yeah, I know… that was cuter in my head.

This is a great explanation of how and why you do what you want.
Sometimes, I agonize a tiny bit about posting something heavy or serious, but then I quickly remember why I started it in the first place – it’s not meant to be *just* about sex, but who we are, as women, and all the gooey, funny, heart-breaking, mortifying, ridiculous shit that comes along with it.
Here! Here! 

Anyone who would write that comment isn’t paying attention and your lovely, sweet, earthy, gritty, naughty, silly blog is better off without them.  Yes, we love the naughty and the silly, but don’t we all have those sides to some extent?  But maybe they missed the fact that you are growing your own food, that you adore creating amazing food almost more than anything else, and that you raise chickens for fresh eggs?  It’s not like good food is a passing fancy for you…it’s more like “natural talent and secret dream”.  So to hell with them, we love the real you.  And your chickens.  xo

who we are as women… indeed. It saddened me to get that comment from another woman, on a purely feminist-y level. Like, really? We’re now reducing each OTHER to nothing but smutty stories? How unrealistic is that??

My hens, my garden and most importantly… all sides of me… thank you so much. You’re awesome. Seriously.

Very well said.  No one has the right to tell you who you are or what you should do.  They can just fuck off.  You are who you are.

I don’t blog myself but know a few bloggers and when they set off on their blogging adventure they try and stick to a single topic (I am sure it makes blogging easier and you can target an audience) but sooner or later I find they branch out and start revealing other facets of themselves.  No different to meeting a ‘new friend in real life.  If i had a friend who talked of nothing but sex every time we got together well we soon wouldn’t be friends cos even sex talk can get boring after a while but as a friendship grows you discover new and amazing things about each other and that’s what sustains the relationship not a single facet or topic.  Don’t stop revealing who you are, we are here for the long haul.

Good lord…people are so full of themselves sometimes. SERIOUSLY? It is YOUR blog and you can write whatever you DAMN well please. I think it is good you posted this response. Fuck ‘em.

Good lord…people are so full of themselves sometimes. SERIOUSLY? It is YOUR blog and you can write whatever you DAMN well please. I think it is good you posted this response. Fuck ‘em.

You shower validation upon me!!! I like you, you can stay

Oh, that is such an excellent point. Surely you would get sick of me only telling dick and sex jokes all. the. time. I love hte way you worded that. Thanks!

ha! Way to be blunt, sista’. Thanks. #VegasIsTheNewSparklecorn

I’m just pissed I wasn’t around for the dildo giveaway.

stick around… there should be more in the near future . Oh wait… did I give away the surprise?

I think this post rocks… hardcore. almost as much as you do, yourself. and while I also love the filthy banter? I love the deep posts too. I’d probably even love the recipes if I could cook worth a damn, for now though, they just make me hungry xo

maybe I could be your personal chef… in exchange for a plane ticket. Do you live somewhere cool?

I read the comment in question and I don’t think that they were trying to be hurtful or anything. I think they were trying to tell you what they want your blog to be.

But, on the flip side, it’s your blog, you control the content. If they don’t like you exploring all of your life, then they can screw off.

I completely agree. On all fronts. I don’t think she meant to be hurtful, but nobody puts Baby in the corner.

What the what? Why would anyone think it was her place to tell a blogger what to write or not write? That is ludicrous! 

I kinda thought so too. I sulked for a bit and then decided I’m not a sulker

Even in anger, you’re a classy broad.

Also, food, sex and kids — totally inter-connected.

This makes me sad.

This is your blog, and the times I have come here, you have seemed to be a person who doesn’t put up a facade. You are honest, down to earth, and something that is only covered by the word sincere.

This is your blog, your ball, your playground: you do what you want.

When I found you, through twitter, I remember finding a food recipe right away…that was a year ago.

You’ve always blogged what I felt was in a consistent voice.

How and why people feel you have to be what they want you to be.

I received a note after I went to tBlogHer telling me  that I was NOT what I was on line.

Which led to more emails telling me “At least I”M who I say I am” and others like “I can tell you that when you meet me, I am the same person IRL as online.”

Like slamming me b/c I’m quiet, shy, in the background.

People mad that you’re not what THEY want you to be, what they imagined you to be.

That’s the ugliness of living publicly: so sorry about this novel, but I knew, when I read this, that the words would start flying out, b/c of what happened to me when I returned from BlogHer.

I saw you at CheeseburgHer but was too shy to come and say Hi b/c I told myself someone cool like you wouldn’t want to talk to an old lady like me.

Bad inner dialogue, I know…and now I”m kicking myself in the pants over it.

I think you’re one of a kind.

Food, sex, BOOZE and kids… practically the same things. Also, classy broad is just about the nicest compliment in the world. Thanks!

omg, I can’t believe people sent you emails like that?! That’s crazy talk. I think that if we’re the exact same online as we are offline, or if we’re completely different, it really kind of doesn’t matter. As long as our online persona is enjoyable to read and our offline persona isn’t an asshole, then what does it matter? It doesn’t hurt anyone. And to be totally honest, the people who are way different than I expected were the ones I found most interesting. It was nice meeting people in person and feeling like I already knew them (when they were the same as I thougth they’d be) and catching up/hanging out. But the people who were totally unexpected were fascinating. And I am so sad that you didn’t come up to me at Cheeseburgher. I didn’t see anyone that night I don’t think. I still had exhausted-from-sparklecorn blinders on . God I was so tired that night. And don’t tell anyone, but I’m a boring old lady, still just barely fitting into a cool suit. It won’t fit much longer . I would have LOVED to hug you.

I always struggle with what to share online and what not to share, because I feel like if I put it all out there then there will be more things for people to be judgmental about. But I think it’s a process, like you mentioned. You slowly reveal more of yourself, like you would with any friendship you are building over time. And like any good relationship that is cultivated with respect, we can agree to disagree – but hurting someone’s character is never NEVER called for. Back off and go find a new blog to read, we don’t need that poison. Sorry that it happened to you, friend.

I always struggle with what to share online and what not to share, because I feel like if I put it all out there then there will be more things for people to be judgmental about. But I think it’s a process, like you mentioned. You slowly reveal more of yourself, like you would with any friendship you are building over time. And like any good relationship that is cultivated with respect, we can agree to disagree – but hurting someone’s character is never NEVER called for. Back off and go find a new blog to read, we don’t need that poison. Sorry that it happened to you, friend.

Thanks. I think she meant well, it was just really badly executed. And I think it’s important that I stand up and say, “I’m sorry, but no matter how tactfully you tried to do it… telling me who I should be and what I should do aren’t things I take kindly to.”

Thanks. I think she meant well, it was just really badly executed. And I think it’s important that I stand up and say, “I’m sorry, but no matter how tactfully you tried to do it… telling me who I should be and what I should do aren’t things I take kindly to.”

ABSOLUTELY you should stand up and say it. And if it was a well-intentioned comment then perhaps it was something that could have been written to you personally. I’m all for constructive criticism, just not hurtful criticism. Homey don’t play dat.

It did sting a bit. I was like, really? As I responded to another comment, it kinda shocked me on a feminist level. I’m not all feminazi-man-hating psycho, but I like to feel the sisterhood a bit and being told that I should pull myself together and talk about sex all day instead of something that is a genuine interest/passion/talent of mine was kind of disappointing!

For me personally, it’s your variety that keeps me reading. You are FABULOUS. Keep it up!

Variety… hmmm… crap, now I have to glue peacock feathers to my ass and do the MC Hammer dance tomorrow. Wait, not that kind of variety, right?

I love this post!  And your blog is awesome.  Your blog is one of the blogs that inspired me to start blogging. (Did that make sense?  It sounded better better before I typed it out)  You’re authentic and funny, and very 3-dimensional.  I don’t understand why people can’t keep some comments to themselves-I guess their mother never taught them to keep their mouth shut if they had nothing nice to say.

I love this post!  And your blog is awesome.  Your blog is one of the blogs that inspired me to start blogging. (Did that make sense?  It sounded better better before I typed it out)  You’re authentic and funny, and very 3-dimensional.  I don’t understand why people can’t keep some comments to themselves-I guess their mother never taught them to keep their mouth shut if they had nothing nice to say.

So sorry to hear that!  I love everything that you post!  Don’t stop doing what you do.  You’re fabulous!

That’s an amazing compliment, thank you! I don’t know if I’ve ever told the people who inspired me to start blogging, but after how good that felt, I just might have to!

If I kept my mouth shut when I didn’t have anything nice to say, I would have my mouth shut almost all the time. But I think there’s a line on the not-nice things that should be said. And I swear, I try REALLY FUCKING HARD to never tell anyone who, how or what they should be. I always try to be mindful not to overstep that line. Because it’s just so wrong.

thanks!

We love you because you ARE multi-faceted and we never know from day to day what we are going to read.  It makes you interesting and it makes you human.  Some people are just plain stupid.

the only thing about you that surprised me was how tiny you are!

Thanks, lady. Are you still shredding?

Well said. Small minded people will always be just that small minded. Keep doing what you do and know that most of us DO know that there are more than just 2 dimensions to the Babe =D

I can’t help but think, isn’t there more than two dimensions to all of us? Why the fuck do we feel the need to pack each other in tiny boxes? It’s crazy, right?

That seemed to be the comment I got from everyone… you’re so tiny. I guess it could have been a lot worse. No, I’m not shredding… but I desperately need to. Have to start up again and get myself into a routine.

I funked my knee up earlier this week doing it, so have laid low the last few days. Back at it tomorrow. You should put “I’m tiny.” in your bio

Tiny but mighty. I never really thought of myself as tiny before. Now I’m just feeling really small.

one of my favorite English children’s book is about a boy named Oliver who was small but mighty. I try to make my kids listen to it way more than they want

My 11 year old daughter just reached my height (5′-2″) – I can’t imagine how tall she’ll be when she stops growing.

No one can ever tell you who you are other than yourself xoxox

exactly. and that is why you’re awesome. and have a great rack.

exactly. and that is why you’re awesome. and have a great rack.

34E and all me. Right back atcha xoxo

that was my bra size when I was crazy ENGORGED with milk. Yours seems more impressive than mine did. How is that possible?

I stopped getting fitted when I was pregnant because honestly I was just happy I wasn’t toppling over and once the girl said “I think we need a GG” around 7 months and  I gave her a look that scared her straight out of the dressing room I decided it was best to not know and just stuff them in there.

I literally just said HAHA… all alone, in my living room.

And I totally love you just the way you are. Mostly because you write what you think AND you have recipes AND you want to help save the world. Just sayin’. 

[...] I Am More Than Tits & Ass 80 comment(s) [...]

Umm.. absolutely that kind of variety. haha

WOW!  Look at all the comment love!  It speaks for itself, no?

We love you just the way you are.

love you right back. really.

I think if someone ever tells me there’s anything “wrong” with the way I blog I will have to serve them up a tall glass of Eff Off!  Seriously, the nerve!

That’s pretty nervy. No one is one dimensional- its part of what makes a blog interesting and fun. How else would you get to know the person behind it?

Great response!

As someone who still blogs anonymously, I aspire to become more like you. You are amazing and perfect just the way you are, so please try not to let that’ person’s comment stay too long in your head. This is your home and your right to be who you are here. I’ve never read anything that you’ve written that I didn’t like. {{HUGS}}

Make sure and put ice in it. A tall glass of Eff Off should always be on the rocks

THanks! I just felt like I had to respond. I almost didn’t, but ultimately had to.

blogging anonymously is a good fit for some people. There are times when I wish I was still anonymous so I could say somethings that I can’t for the sake of my kids or my husband’s privacy, etc. Aspire to be just like you… you’re awesome at it.